Yes Means Yes!: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World without Rape

Yes Means Yes!: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World without Rape

by Jaclyn Friedman, Jessica Valenti

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Overview

This groundbreaking feminist classic dismantles the way we view rape in our culture and replaces it with a genuine understanding and respect for female sexual pleasure.
In the original edition, feminist, political, and activist writers alike presented their ideas for a paradigm shift from the "No Means No" model--and the result was the groundbreaking shift to today's affirmative consent model ("Yes Means Yes," as coined by this book).

With a timely new introduction, refreshed cover, and the timeless contributions of authors from Kate Harding to Jill Filipovic, Yes Means Yes brings to the table a dazzling variety of perspectives and experiences focused on the theory that educating all people to value female sexuality and pleasure leads to viewing women differently, and ending rape. Yes Means Yes has radical and far-reaching effects: from teaching men to treat women as collaborators and not conquests, encouraging men and women that women can enjoy sex instead of being shamed for it, and ultimately, that our children can inherit a world where rape is rare and swiftly punished.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781580058995
Publisher: Basic Books
Publication date: 03/05/2019
Sold by: Hachette Digital, Inc.
Format: NOOK Book
Sales rank: 947,644
File size: 1 MB

About the Author

Jessica Valenti is the author of multiple books on feminism, politics and culture, and editor of the anthology Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape.

Jessica is also the founder of Feministing.com, which Columbia Journalism Review called "head and shoulders above almost any writing on women's issues in mainstream media."

Her writing has appeared in publications like The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Nation, and Ms. magazine. She is currently a columnist at the Guardian US. Jessica lives in Brooklyn with her husband and daughter.

Jaclyn Friedman's work has redefined the concept of "healthy sexuality" and popularized the "yes means yes" standard of sexual consent that is quickly becoming law on many U.S. campuses. She is a popular speaker and opinion writer and the creator of three books: Yes Means Yes, What You Really Really Want and Unscrewed.

Friedman is a founder and the former Executive Director of Women, Action & the Media, where she led the successful #FBrape campaign to apply Facebook's hate-speech ban to content that promotes gender-based violence. She hosts Unscrewed, a podcast exploring paths to sexual liberation, named a Best Sex Podcast by both Marie Claire and Esquire.

Table of Contents

Foreword Margaret Cho 1

Introduction 5

1 Offensive Feminism: The Conservative Gender Norms That Perpetuate Rape Culture, and How Feminists Can Fight Back Jill Filipovic 13

Themes: Media Matters, the Right is Wrong

2 Toward a Performance Model of Sex Thomas Macaulay Millar 29

Themes: Is Consent Complicated?, Manliness, Sexual Healing, the Right is Wrong

3 Beyond Yes or No: Consent as Sexual Process Rachel Kramer Bussel 43

Themes: Is Consent Complicated?, Sexual Healing

4 A Woman's Worth Javacia N. Harris 53

Themes: Media Matters, Race Relating, Sexual Healing

5 How Do You Fuck a Fat Woman? Kate Harding 67

Themes: Media Matters, Much Taboo About Nothing, Sexual Healing

6 Queering Black Female Heterosexuality Kimberly Springer 77

Themes: Here and Queer, Much Taboo about Nothing, Race Relating

7 What It Feels Like When It Finally Comes: Surviving Incest in Real Life Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha 93

Themes: Here and Queer, Race Relating, Surviving to Yes

8 A Love Letter from an Anti-Rape Activist to Her Feminist Sex-Toy Store Lee Jacobs Riggs 107

Themes: Much Taboo About Nothing, Sexual Healing, Surviving to Yes

9 The Fantasy of Acceptable "Non-Consent": Why the Female Sexual Submissive Scares Us (and Why She Shouldn't) Stacey May Fowles 117

Themes: Media Matters, Much Taboo about Nothing

10 Invasion of Space by a Female Coco Fusco 127

Themes: Fight the Power, Media Matters, Race Relating

11 When Sexual Autonomy Isn't Enough: Sexual Violence Against Immigrant Women in the United States Miriam Zoila Pérez 141

Themes: Fight the Power, Race Relating

12 Trial by Media: Black Female Lasciviousness and the Question of Consent Samkita Mukhopadhyay 151

Themes: Fight the Power, Media Matters, Race Relating

13 An Old Enemy in a New Outfit: How Date Rape Became Gray Rape and Why It Matters Lisa Jervis 163

Themes: Is Consent Complicated?, Media Matters

14 Reclaiming Touch: Rape Culture, Explicit Verbal Consent, and Body Sovereignty Hazel/Cedar Troost 171

Themes: Is Consent Complicated?, Sexual Healing

15 An Immodest Proposal Heather Corinna 179

Themes: Electric Youth, Is Consent Complicated?, Sexual Healing

16 Hooking Up with Healthy Sexuality: The Lessons Boys Learn (and Don't Learn) About Sexuality, and Why a Sex-Positive Rape Prevention Paradigm Can Benefit Everyone Involved Brad Perry 193

Themes: Electric Youth, Manliness

17 The Not-Rape Epidemic Latoya Peterson 209

Themes: Electric Youth, Fight the Power, Surviving to Yes

18 Shame Is the First Betrayer Toni Amato 221

Themes: Here and Queer, Much Taboo about Nothing, Surviving to Yes

19 Why Nice Guys Finish Last Julia Serano 227

Themes: Here and Queer, Manliness, Much Taboo about Nothing

20 Sex Worth Fighting For Anastasia Kigginbotham 241

Themes: Much Taboo about Nothing, Sexual Healing, Surviving to Yes

21 Killing Misogyny: A Personal Story of Love, Violence, and Strategies for Survival Cristina Meztli Tzintzún 251

Themes: Race Relating, Surviving to Yes

22 When Pregnancy Is Outlawed, Only Outlaws Will Be Pregnant Tiloma Jayasinghe 265

Themes: Fight the Power, Race Relating

23 Who're You Calling a Whore?: A Conversation with Three Sex Workers on Sexuality, Empowerment, and the Industry Susan Lopez Mariko Passion Saundra 273

Themes: Fight the Power, Much Taboo about Nothing, Surviving to Yes

24 The Process-Oriented Virgin Hanne Blank 287

Themes: Electric Youth, Much Taboo about Nothing

25 Purely Rape: The Myth of Sexual Purity and How It Reinforces Rape Culture Jessica Valenti 299

Themes: Electric Youth, Media Matters, The Right is Wrong

26 Real Sex Education Cara Kulwicki 305

Thames: Electric Youth, Much Taboo about Nothing, Sexual Healing

27 In Defense of Going Wild or: How I Stopped Worrying and Learned to Love Pleasure (and How You Can, Too) Jaclyn Friedman 313

Themes: Media Matters, Sexual Healing

Notes 321

Contents (By Theme) 333

About the Contributors 341

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Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and A World Without Rape 4.1 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 16 reviews.
WomensHealthPtbo on LibraryThing More than 1 year ago
Yes means Yes! is a collection of very interesting (and informal language) essays from a wide range of perspectives (female, male, trans, straight, queer, different races, etc.) on sex, sexuality, rape culture, sexual expression, and the prevention of sexual violence. The contributors range from bloggers, to magazine editors, to activists, to lawyers, to sex educators, to assault prevention workers, etc. and all have different preferences, experiences, and perspectives on sex and sexual violence. The essays have been assigned "themes" (like tags) allowing reader to flip through book on whatever theme or tangent interests them at the time. Enjoyable, interesting and potentially very enlightening read (depending on the audience, of course, for some this will be "preaching to the choir"). One warning: some readers may find some of the language some of the essayists use rude or offensive.
ryvre on LibraryThing More than 1 year ago
I'm not normally a fan of Jessica Valenti, but I liked the premise of this book enough that I decided to give it a try, and I'm glad I did.Like any anthology, it had it's high points and low point, but there were no contributions that I truly hated. There were a few contributions that really resonated with me: The Forward by Margaret Cho, "Not Rape Epidemic" by Latoya Peterson, and "In Defense of Going Wild" by Jaclyn Friedman.
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"Yes Mean Yes" is the most interesting coverage of the topics of female sexuality and the rape culture that I have ever read. In this collection of essays, different viewpoints as well as summaries of research come together to paint an honest picture of the society we live in and how it affects each of us individually as well as the female collective. I encourage every parent, teacher and friend to share this with the females of their lives.
Rae281 More than 1 year ago
The author, Jerald J. Howard, added me on Facebook and sent me some poems. I continued the read the poems and excerpts he posted and decided to order the book... I started reading the first night and couldn't get myself to stop reading! It had comedy, shocking moments, a little sadness, and A LOT of sex! lol You can really relate to some characters and events in the story. Especially if you are a college student. Also, you can communicate with him on the site, unlike many other authors now. I just bought his previously published books and I will definitely continue to buy his books! Enjoy :)