Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come: One Introvert's Year of Saying Yes

Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come: One Introvert's Year of Saying Yes

by Jessica Pan

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What would happen if a shy introvert lived like a gregarious extrovert for one year? If she knowingly and willingly put herself in perilous social situations that she’d normally avoid at all costs? Writer Jessica Pan intends to find out. With the help of various extrovert mentors, Jessica sets up a series of personal challenges (talk to strangers, perform stand-up comedy, host a dinner party, travel alone, make friends on the road, and much, much worse) to explore whether living like an extrovert can teach her lessons that might improve the quality of her life. Chronicling the author’s hilarious and painful year of misadventures, this book explores what happens when one introvert fights her natural tendencies, takes the plunge, and tries (and sometimes fails) to be a little bit braver.


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781524854386
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
Publication date: 05/28/2019
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: NOOK Book
Pages: 272
Sales rank: 79,830
File size: 5 MB

About the Author

JESSICA PAN is a journalist whose work has appeared in the Guardian’s Weekend magazine, The Cut, Refinery29, and Vice, among others. She has a degree in psychology from Brown University and is the coauthor of Graduates in Wonderland, an epistolary memoir about living in Beijing and Paris. She previously worked as a TV reporter and magazine editor in Beijing and now lives in London. Find her @JessicaLPan on Twitter and @JessyPanPan on Instagram.

Table of Contents

Author's Note ix

Introduction xi

The Sauna, A Story or Rock Bottom 1

Talking to Strangers or New People 11

Shaking in the Spotlight or Stage Fright 35

Heart Problems, A Real-Life Interlude 59

In Search of the One or Friend-Dating 69

Crowd Control or Networking 91

The Wedding in Germany, A Real-Life Interlude 109

Free-Falling or Improvisation 117

Everest or Stand-up Comedy 131

Talking to Men, A Real-Life Interlude 153

La-La Land or Traveling Solo 165

Scotch Courage or Stand-up Comedy, Round II 187

Introvert into the Woods, A Real-Life Interlude 193

Redemption or Stand-up Comedy, Round III 205

Come Dine with Me or Hosting a Dinner Party 213

Introvert. Extrovert. Convert? Conclusion 229

A Note on Introversion and Methodology 237

Notes 239

Acknowledgments 251

About the Author 255

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Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come: One Introvert's Year of Saying Yes 4 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 7 reviews.
Anonymous 3 months ago
A perfect alternative to fiction as a book club choice, Jessica's story will resonate with introverts everywhere even if you don't share her crippling shyness. The challenges she sets herself during a year of "extrovert ing" would probably be tough for a lot of people much less someone who likes to scream into her pillow and who was traumatized by a surprise birthday party. Readers may recognize themselves in these pages or someone they know and hopefully its hard won lessons will encourage us to ask the deeper questions.
DoveArt 3 months ago
I think this book will be relatable to people beyond whether they consider themselves to be introverts. The author does a great job of conveying her struggles with being both shy and introverted (a "shintrovert," she calls it), while at the same time framing it as a personal journey and not a reflection on the many introverted people who are living happy and well-balanced lives. So this book is about getting out of our comfort zones, and growing, and being flexible rather than letting a label predetermine us. It was insightful and courageous, with funny and witty writing. I enjoyed it, and think I would love it as an audiobook! Thanks to NetGalley for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
xxjenadanxx 3 months ago
This is the EXACTLY the book I needed. I don't think I have ever written a book, but reading this one makes me think I have. I too am a 30 something, shy, introverted, small town Texas girl who has no idea how to have a conversation (that doesn't involve ghosts or dogs) or make friends. I'm not Chinese, Aries or named Jessica (Pan) but I would have been if my cousin hadn't been born first, forcing my Mom to "get creative" and name me Jennifer (Ann) instead. The title of this book caught my attention, because SAME, but I had no idea just how relatable it was going to be! There were SO many times I caught myself nodding along enthusiastically or cringing at how awful some of these experiences she was forcing herself to have were, and just laughing out loud. Literally. I have finished this book inspired to go on an extrovert journey of my own - not today - but maybe someday soon I will be as brave as Jessica is.
Anonymous 3 months ago
This book started off interesting and relatable and just started dragging on. The author is on a journey of interacting more with people. She learns to have deeper conversations with strangers, and to not have so much anxiety. It’s a narrative on her process to becoming more sociable and having more friends.
almtzd 3 months ago
Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come by Jessica Pan has been one of my favorite reads of this Spring. Part memoir, part self-help, this book was funny, forgiving, and wholehearted. In this Book, Pan tells us stories about the year that she decided to start saying yes and pushing her boundaries more. She talks about being an introvert, being a depressed introvert, being a depressed introvert with anxiety, and also doing all of those things while sitting in a sauna fully clothed. (Don't ask.) Some of the stories she shared made me laugh, and some of them made me pause and look inward, but each of them was unique and fun and a special challenge to the reader to examine their own lives. At times, I too have felt that “my life was passing me by” and the struggle that Pan describes is authentic and validating. I love this kind of book and it is right up my alley. Jessica Pan, like Jenny Lawson or Brene Brown, has an uncanny knack for making you laugh and insightful profundity at the same time. I felt empowered, amused, and satisfied by the end of this delightful book and I would highly recommend it to anyone. Received this DRC through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
Anonymous 4 months ago
The title of this book is so me! I am an introvert so my first reaction is to want to stay home. I really liked this book and I would read more from Ms. Pan!
CaptainsQuarters 4 months ago
Ahoy there me mateys!  I received this memoir eARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.  So here be me honest musings . . . Okay so I be an introvert from an entire family of very extroverted people. So when I saw this title it made me laugh and I had to give it a go. And the author's journey is hell, pure and simple.  I was impressed.  I can talk to strangers if I must.  Though the sails end up tattered and all hope was nearly lost, I have survived public speaking engagements.  A Captain must do such things or face mutiny.  But doing improv or performing stand-up comedy.  I would rather slit me own throat.  I am an introvert who despises having to force extrovertedness at all costs.  Only for survival mateys! I ended up having a decent time reading this one.  I certainly found the first half of the book much more to me taste then the second half.  I feel that the latter part of her year seemed to be discussed in less detail.  It was less about the interesting people she met and more about the social situations liking traveling alone or taking magic mushrooms or more comedy nights.  I have no interest in the mushrooms and no problems traveling alone.  So I did get a bit bored.  But ultimately I applaud this kindred introvert and her pluck.  Congrats matey.  I raise me grog in toast.  Arrrr! So lastly . . . Thank you Andrews McMeel Publishing!