Queen Bees and Wannabes, 3rd Edition: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boys, and the New Realities of Girl World

Queen Bees and Wannabes, 3rd Edition: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boys, and the New Realities of Girl World

by Rosalind Wiseman


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“My daughter used to be so wonderful. Now I can barely stand her and she won’t tell me anything. How can I find out what’s going on?”

“There’s a clique in my daughter’s grade that’s making her life miserable. She doesn’t want to go to school anymore. Her own supposed friends are turning on her, and she’s too afraid to do anything. What can I do?”

Welcome to the wonderful world of your daughter’s adolescence. A world in which she comes to school one day to find that her friends have suddenly decided that she no longer belongs. Or she’s teased mercilessly for wearing the wrong outfit or having the wrong friend. Or branded with a reputation she can’t shake. Or pressured into conforming so she won’t be kicked out of the group. For better or worse, your daughter’s friendships are the key to enduring adolescence—as well as the biggest threat to her well-being.

In her groundbreaking book, Queen Bees and Wannabes, Empower cofounder Rosalind Wiseman takes you inside the secret world of girls’ friendships. Wiseman has spent more than a decade listening to thousands of girls talk about the powerful role cliques play in shaping what they wear and say, how they respond to boys, and how they feel about themselves. In this candid, insightful book, she dissects each role in the clique: Queen Bees, Wannabes, Messengers, Bankers, Targets, Torn Bystanders, and more. She discusses girls’ power plays, from birthday invitations to cafeteria seating arrangements and illicit parties. She takes readers into “Girl World” to analyze teasing, gossip, and reputations; beauty and fashion; alcohol and drugs; boys and sex; and more, and how cliques play a role in every situation.

Each chapter includes “Check Your Baggage” sections to help you identify how your own background and biases affect how you see your daughter. “What You Can Do to Help” sections offer extensive sample scripts, bulleted lists, and other easy-to-use advice to get you inside your daughter’s world and help you help her.

It’s not just about helping your daughter make it alive out of junior high. This book will help you understand how your daughter’s relationship with friends and cliques sets the stage for other intimate relationships as she grows and guides her when she has tougher choices to make about intimacy, drinking and drugs, and other hazards. With its revealing look into the secret world of teenage girls and cliques, enlivened with the voices of dozens of girls and a much-needed sense of humor, Queen Bees and Wannabes will equip you with all the tools you need to build the right foundation to help your daughter make smarter choices and empower her during this baffling, tumultuous time of life.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781101903056
Publisher: Potter/Ten Speed/Harmony/Rodale
Publication date: 07/26/2016
Pages: 448
Sales rank: 58,264
Product dimensions: 5.17(w) x 7.94(h) x 0.95(d)

About the Author

Rosalind Wiseman is a teacher, thought leader and bestselling author.  As the co-founder of Cultures of Dignity, she works with educators, students, administrators, and parents around the world on the physical and emotional wellbeing of young people. She wrote Queen Bees & Wannabees, the book that inspired the hit movie and musical "Mean Girls," Masterminds & Wingmen, as well as Owning Up: Empowering Adolescents to Confront Social Cruelty, Bullying, and Injustice, a new curriculum for middle and high school students.


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Excerpted from "Queen Bees and Wannabes, 3rd Edition"
by .
Copyright © 2016 Rosalind Wiseman.
Excerpted by permission of Potter/Ten Speed/Harmony/Rodale.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Table of Contents

Introduction 1

1 Cliques and Popularity 21

2 Is It Really Happening So Much Younger? 57

3 Passport to Girl World 71

4 Breaking Through the Wall 92

5 Technology, Social Networking, and Girl World 125

6 The Mirror 158

7 Mean Girls: Teasing and Gossiping 197

8 Power Plays and Politics: Speaking Truth in Girl World 239

9 Boy World 276

10 Girl World Meets Boy World 294

11 Pleasing Boys, Betraying Yourself 326

12 Sex, Drugs, Alcohol, and Partying in Girl World 367

13 Getting Help 405

Resources 415

Acknowledgments 425

Index 427

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Queen Bees and Wannabes, 3rd Edition: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boys, and the New Realities of Girl World 4.5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 2 reviews.
MotherofPeace More than 1 year ago
Queen Bees Wannabes by Rosalind Wiseman The Queen Bee And Her Court Queen Bee She will do anything to have control Sidekick She notices everything about the Queen Bee. Banker Her power lies in getting girls to confide in her. Messenger She wants to prove her usefulness to the other girls. Pleaser/Wannabe She will do almost anything to be in the group or gain favor from the Queen Bee. Torn Bystander She doesn’t want to go against the powerful people in the group usually convinces herself not to challenge them. Target Targets don’t want to tell their parents because they don’t want their parents to think they’re a loser or a nobody. Champion In every girl there is a Champion who wants to get out. A lot of us have a daughter, granddaughter, niece or even a female cousin that has to go to school. Have you ever thought about what might be happening at school? The turmoil they might be going through each and every day? No, of course. Because you think, as so many of us do, that they are safe, and enjoying high school. No one wants to think that some girl is trying to Lord over your loved one and to make her life miserable and possibly be the cause of her committing suicide. It happens every day, yet, we are unaware because they don’t want to tell for fear of retaliation from the girl or the group or both. Take a look at your loved one when she comes in the door, look her up and down, scrutinize her. Then ask if there is anything she wants to tell you, tell her you love her and nothing could ever make you not love her. This book is a gold mine. I didn’t have that problem with my girls, Thank God, but if I had, this would have been the book I would have needed to deal with what was going on. It has so much information and solutions. Pick up a copy today. You won’t regret it. Good Reading!!! I received a complimentary copy of this book from Blogging For Books for this review.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
My daughter has been asking about boyfriends and popularity.